Question by wildflower: I suffer from alcohol addiction.?
My husband knows my struggle with alcohol but will get drunk on occasion and order drinks in front of me. His makes me go to his parents house on all holidays because my family is too dysfunctional to have events. When we go there is alcohol in the fridge and wine displayed everywhere for fun. His Mom even cooks with it and has little bottles on the counter unopened for me to see and smell. Alcohol has almost destroyed my life. I suffer and they even gossip terribly about my addiction. I attended AA and was sober for 5 months and they made my life hell. My husband never treated me worse then the time I tried to be sober and I faithfully went to meetings everyday because my life depended on it. I lost 20 pounds of beer fat and started to actually look beautiful and happy the first time in a long time. He brought up my past sins and he and his relatives put me down constantly. I am now fat and unable to stop drinking again. He seems happy with his life but I am sad and feel hopeless. When I went to AA he would make sure and try to take up all the times I needed to go to AA. He even told me that AA was for people who are weak that can’t go from point a to b. I then decided to start going to church and was doing ok. He refused to go and then began to tell me all my faults and the reasons why I am not good enough for church. My kids refuse to go because he puts church down. My relatives now hate me because of my big mouth when I drink. I now have nobody who loves me but my kids. He is even trying to make that bad slowly but surely. He says now that if I leave him I don’t have even my family I came from to go to because I am no good. I can’t win it seems. My life seems like a mess because I have let it get out of control without realizing it. What should I do to repair it first?    Read more...